Yellow Light

Dear Car Who Caused a Man to Lose his Job,

You are an idiot. Thanks a lot for taking someones job away from them just because you thought you could make it. Well sister you didn't have enough room. Didn't anyone tell you that you wait until the light it red to go if there isn't a safe length to go. You have caused me some stress that really isn't needed in my life right now. I am doing the best I can. I will now be finding another job so I can help pay the bills because the most amazing person I know lost his job because of you. Please be smart when you drive because you never know what kind of impact you are going to have on someones life. You didn't kill my brother and I appreciate that but you have definitely changed the way I live my life. No more adventures because I will be helping my brother until he can get back on his feet. I just don't understand why it came to this. Since when is it one strike you are out? What happened to three strikes your out? My brother has worked so hard for these people he served them with all he had. His faith was already shaken and now he is knows for sure that prayers aren't answered. Thank you person for ruining my chances as having my brother at my wedding one day. I guess it doesn't matter to you because you have your fancy car you have your job, family and food on your table. But now my brother won't just because you decided to make a stupid decision.

A yellow light changed my life forever. A car in park city ran a yellow light right in front of an eletric bus now that bus driver has no job. He didn't hit the car he swerved and missed the  car but he was one punished for your stupidity which is not fair but I have been teaching my students that life isn't fair and now I know that to be true. My heart is angered and sad because I know that there will be no more vacations because someone lost their job because you decided that you could make that turn when you didn't have space.

Mistakes Happen No need to Ruin someones life

Today is the most amazing lady I knows birthday! The worst thing that could ever happen to her did today of all days. She first gets moved to a new school forced to move after 17 years at the high school now at the community high. It's fine we will play your games. The day you decided to ruin her career. She has a family to provide for. Now when there is no food for her family to eat or when she can't afford her medicine, I hope you can sleep knowing you killed someone. Without her medicine she can and will die! She needs insulin to live like everyone else. Just because of a mistake you are willing to ruin her career? Wow what a great person you are. Now she won't be able to provide for her family. Person who did this I hope you aren't able to provide for your family and your children go hungry. Oh wait they won't ever have to because you still have a career and a job. You can provide. My mom is the one who is getting the short end of the stick. No food, no medicine oh well and all you care about is a paycheck. Lady who did this I hope you read this and you know that I know what it's like to be hungry and not have food for weeks or heat for that matter. I have been there and I am not going to let that happen to my mom. I will pick up another job I will make sure she can get her medicine. While you drive your Mercedes around and you feed your family. I'll be the one taking care of my mom who's life you ruined thanks a lot. Lucky for you karma will come back for you and I hope I get to see it knock you down so hard you can't get back up. Go die in a ditch lady eat rocks and die. You don't deserve to live!

Greatest Struggle is your Greatest Strength

Sometimes your greatest struggle is your greatest strength. I knew the last semester of school would be hard but I didn't think that it would help me become closer to my heavenly father and it helped me make some amazing friends. Let me tell you about my greatest struggle. This is my last semester I was angry and bitter. I was angry because I was rejected to go to New Zealand  and I got 5th grade. But I wouldn't change having 5th grade for anything in the world. 5th grade has changed my life. It has taught me many things. First it taught me that I don't know everything like I like to believe I do. I learned how to teach from the heart and to let the real you shine because you can't teach something you don't believe in.
There were many days after school I called my mom in tears because I couldn't do everything I needed. I told her many times I was done and ready to quit and she always said okay but where's that going to get you. My mom didn't raise a quitter she raised a fighter. I have fought so hard to get where I am today. The praxis still is a struggle but it will come. I finished student teaching and EDTPA. That was defiantly one of the hardest things I have ever done.
During this semester I went to dinner with a friend and she looked me in the eye and said you survived a mission you can survive 5th grade. I looked at her and said I would rather be back on the mission and she said that bad. Student teaching wasn't bad it was hard. Probably one of the hardest things I have ever done. I wouldn't change my student teaching for anything in the world. I made some of the greatest friends. I love those students as if they were my own. I know that some hard harder than others.
Teaching is amazing. I love teaching. Teaching is a hard profession yes but it is so rewarding. I am so thankful for all the things I learned the friends I made. My life has truly been blessed this last semester.
Until next time I am off to my next adventure. Peace Out cub scout. Play hard, run harder. Keep the Faith. Over and Out!

Last Day of Student Teaching

What a last day I had of student teaching. I was so exited to eat lunch with my two favorite people but that didn't happen. Let me start from the beginning of the lunch. I put my lunch in the microwave and went to the restroom as I do most days. Another teacher put her easy mac in the microwave as she does everyday but today was different. We were eating lunch as usual and another teacher come in and was like someones lunch is burning. We all turn our heads and orange smoke like I have never seen before was coming from the microwave. The teacher opens it and the smoke gushes out and the smell is horrific! They start fanning the smoke so the fire alarm doesn't go off but no such luck. They take the easy mac out of the microwave and put water on it and then the fire alarm goes off. Everyone is like what do we do we have never had a fire alarm during lunch. Adventure let me tell you what. Everyone packs their lunch up and says here we go. Students were angry that they didn't get to eat and we gathered in classes and made sure we had all of our students. After the fire marshal came and make it safe to go in. Students went back to finish lunch and the microwaves went out and now we only have one. There is more than one teacher lunch is going to be rough. I got to sit by the doors to make sure no one escaped from the building while the doors were open. I also got asked if this was the place to vote and I was like no but you can go play in P.E. if you want that grandma didn't think it was funny.
I always say go big or go home and today I definitely went out with a bang! Student teaching was hard but it was worth every minute and every tear. I wouldn't change it for the world. I made some amazing friends. I was so sad to leave and say goodbye. My heart cried and my heart is sad but I know that it is my turn to fly and be on my own. Sometimes the hardest struggle is our greatest strength.
We had a party with cake and cupcakes. Students wrote me letters. Life comes at you fast and you never know what life is going to throw at you. You just have to roll with the punches take them as they come. I learned that nothing is impossible and you just have to believe in your dreams you will be able to complete anything. I learned over these past few months that you have to learn to trust people and be a team player.
I have learned to love 5th grade. The friends I have made have changed my life. Some of them with never know how much. I am so thankful for the opportunity that I had to student teach and to learn so much.
Have fun, work hard, run harder. I'm off to my next adventure. Keep the Faith! Peace out Cub Scout! Over and out until next time!

Someone is Always there Cheering You on

Sometimes you have to struggle and fight your demons alone. Other times you have to pray with all you have and have faith in tomorrow. My grandma used to have a sign and it was my sign and everybody knew it. It said, "To have a garden is to have faith in tomorrow." Right now that saying runs true in my life. Sometimes the only thing you can do is to have faith in tomorrow. You know it will be hard but in the end it will be worth it.
I have struggled more now than I have in four years. I struggled on my mission but not this bad. It is alright I need this in my life and it is a blessing and I am becoming stronger from it. I have learned that sometimes you just have to shut everyone out and do things alone you have to hit rock bottom before you can come up and see the positives.
I want to tell you a story about a fella I know. One who lets me face the day alone but will always be there when I am ready to talk
Today, I took some ice cream to a friend of mine. He doesn't know how bad I am really struggling but he knows I am struggling. Today he listened to me and didn't say anything until I was through when in all reality he should have been the one talking and I should of been listening. I am so thankful for this kind fella because he has boosted my spirits so many times this semester when I want to give up he is the first one to tell me that I am loved and that I matter. He is the one who picks up the broken pieces and holds them until I am ready to put them back together. He just had his appendix out and is so positive. He is such an amazing example to me. I want to be more like him. I want to be as wonderful as he is. He is a fighter and I am so thankful for that. I am so thankful for his sweet spirit. He is defiantly an answer to my prayers. This fella taught me that it doesn't matter your circumstances it just matters how you take them. The love that he has for the savior is so real and when you are with him you can feel the saviors love.
Fighing your demons alone is hard but sometimes that is just how it needs to be. Sometimes you just have to fight with all you have to have a better tomorrow. Keep the faith. Smile a little brighter. Because someone is always rooting for you.
Peace out cub scout. Until next time. I'm going on my next adventure.

I am NOT INVISIBLE

Today I realized that I was nothing to you and that is totally fine but when you talk to everyone around me and ignore me. I usually don't let it bother me but today it did. I don't care that you don't like me. Not everyone has to like me but can't you act least say Hey Jill when you say hey to everyone in the group I am in. I am not invisible I am human. We used to talk all the time we used to be best friends and now we are worst enemies and there is nothing I can do about it. I don't understand why you treat me like garbage. I am nothing to you I used to be something and you used to mean something to me but now I know that I am nothing to you. You write about how your life is so hard and how things hurt but let me tell you what you hurt me every Sunday. But you don't even care. 

I go to church to feel safe and to feel loved. I don't go to be humiliated by you. People wonder why I go home so much to church and it is because I don't have to worry about being ignored because I know that some people hate me and I don't even care. I just don't understand why I am invisible to you. I know that you see me but it doesn't matter I am nothing.

I am off to my next adventure! Sorry to rant but I just needed the blog world to know that I was someone and not a nobody and I am not invisible. Thanks for reading my rant. Have a wonderful week! Keep the faith! Peace out cub scout! Until next time! Over and out! 

My 2 year old buddy

I have a buddy who is two years old she is my best friend sometimes and worst enemy others. She is full of spunk and sass. She melts my heart. Her name is Jordi she drives me crazy sometimes but I love her. She teaches me what it's like to be loved even on the hardest days. She always says Jill will you play with me. This summer has been rough trying to get enough hours to live the dream. The simple things in life mean the most.
Jordi comes over to Grandma's to play. I live in my aunt and uncle's basement. Jordi comes and plays. She comes downstairs to sit with me and watch a show to get my mind off of things. She loves my Elmo's more then I do she likes my Elmo that makes noise. She likes my snow globes. She helps me sew and make blankets too. This little girl taught me that no matter what life throws at ya anything is possible. She calls me Miss Jilly Jill. That's what my uncle says when I walk in the door. She came to my car door one day and said Jill we go get snow cones we did that once this summer. I say not today but next time.
Jordi taught me that sometimes you have to let life take you where it will because you have to dance to the beat of your own drum.
Jordi is my little buddy. She makes my heart smile when it is sad she brings joy to my heart when I miss my best friend she tries to fill the void. Jordi loves to be wonder woman. This little girl has the pure love of Christ. She kills me. She will dance for you and teach you how to play Barney guitar most importantly she'll let your inner child come out and not judge you.
Jordi is my little buddy. I'll be forever grateful for this fun spunky, sassy little girl.
Play hard run harder keep the faith. I am off to my next adventure. Keep the faith. Until next time peace out cubscout!